Hello out there all you wonderful people, this is Slick Dungeon. Normally on my blog I post about movies, books and role playing games. Today I just want to take a minute to do my part to stop the spread of an epidemic.

All the major health organizations recommend two things to keep us healthy. One is wash your hands and two is not touching your face. I don’t have much to help with the second one but for the first let me do you all a service. We’re supposed to wash for at least 20 seconds which is the lyrics to Happy Birthday twice. Well, if I keep singing that I am going to be approximately four thousand years old in the next half hour. Instead, let’s get this song stuck in your head again. Wash your hands while you sing it and you will be so lost in belting it out, you won’t realize you have spent well over 20 seconds doing it.

Personally I am partial to the Metal version but any version will do.

Lyrics:

When a humble bard
Graced a ride along
With Geralt of Rivia
Along came this song

From when the White Wolf fought
A silver-tongued devil
His army of elves
At his hooves did they revel

They came after me
With masterful deceit
Broke down my lute
And they kicked in my teeth
While the devil’s horns
Minced our tender meat
And so cried the Witcher
He can’t be bleat

Toss a coin to your Witcher
O’ Valley of Plenty
O’ Valley of Plenty
O’
Toss a coin to Your Witcher
O’ Valley of Plenty

At the edge of the world
Fight the mighty horde
That bashes and breaks you
And brings you the morn’

He thrust every elf
Far back on the shelf
High up on the mountain
From whence it came

He wiped out your pest
Got kicked in his chest
He’s a friend of humanity
So give him the rest

That’s my epic tale
A champion prevailed
Defeated the villain
Now pour him some ale

Toss a coin to your Witcher
O’ Valley of Plenty
O’ Valley of Plenty
O’
Toss a coin to your Witcher
And friend of humanity

Toss a coin to your Witcher
O’ Valley of Plenty
O’ Valley of Plenty
O’
And friend of humanity

Toss a coin to your Witcher
O’ Valley of Plenty
O’ Valley of Plenty
O’
Toss a coin to your Witcher
A friend of humanity

There, now it’s stuck in your head again. Go wash your hands!

(Also someone please remind me not to rewatch Contagion)

Sanitarily yours,

Slick Dungeon