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How to Play Call of Cthulhu Part 1 – Getting Started

Cthulhu is calling

Introduction

Hello everyone, it’s Slick Dungeon here. Over the past couple of years I have posted on this blog about my love of role playing games and I have mentioned Call of Cthulhu as one of the games I play several times.

I thought for those who are unfamiliar with this game and how it works I could do a series of posts to help you get started. I’ve seen lots of articles like this but they all seem to assume you’ve at least played role playing games before and sometimes that you’ve played this role playing game before.

These posts will be for those who are interested in playing the horror themed tabletop role playing game but are newcomers to it. I’ll be starting with the basics and give you a rundown of more of the nitty gritty rules in future posts.

If you’ve ever considered playing this game but might be on the fence, let me be your guide and you can decide if it is right for you. Also, let me know if you find this useful or have any feedback for me so I can tailor these entries towards those most interested.

Just in case you have never heard of this game and have no idea what a tabletop role playing is, let me lay it out for you.

A tabletop role playing game is a shared narrative between a group of people. Typically it involves one person taking on the role of a Game Master (in Call of Cthulhu referred to as a Keeper) who guides the group through the story. Not only does this individual control the monsters and other villains who populate the game, they play all of the non-player characters as well. If you were to think of this in video game terms, it’s like being the writer of the game or the developer of the game. Only, unlike video games, the Keeper can actually adapt the story to what the players are doing in real time. The Keeper is also the final arbiter of the rules deciding what does and does not succeed in challenging situations. This usually takes a fair amount of preparation as well as a lot of improvising on the part of the Keeper to pull off well. But it can be a very rewarding experience.

The rest of the people playing are characters. Their characters are who play through the game. In video game terms this would be your avatar. Only, unlike video games, you won’t hit any walls you can’t go past or things the computer just doesn’t allow you to do. You can try to do anything. You may not succeed but in almost all cases you can try. In Call of Cthulhu these characters are called Investigators.

Telling a shared narrative where many of the outcomes are determined by a random number generator in the form of dice is a unique experience and can be seriously rewarding. If you find a like minded group of people to do this with, you will be in for life-long memories. I recommend giving it a try at least once in your life.

If you want to play a game like this which is horror themed, Call of Cthulhu is out and out one of the best games there is to play. I’ll give you a quick overview of it below and provide you with some resources so you can get started with your very own campaign if you decide you want to try it.

The Cthulhu Mythos

Call of Cthulhu is all about Lovecraftian cosmic horror. Cosmic horror is otherworldly, immense, and unknowable. It’s the strange haze in the sky that seems to be making everyone who sees it sick. It’s the unseen bump in the night ready to grab you with its slimy, flesh rotten fingers. It’s the creatures from the depths of the ocean you never knew existed reaching over the side of the railing on your boat before you can do anything about it. It’s alien gods come to toy with humanity in unknown ways for unknown reasons. It’s your sanity slipping away as you finally come face to face with what the universe truly holds.

While there were some instances of cosmic horror prior to H.P. Lovecraft, he was the first one to create a whole mythos around these types of stories. You see some of the same characters, creatures and settings in different stories of his, creating a shared universe.

You don’t need to know a lot about cosmic horror, or H.P. Lovecraft’s work to play this game. There are some who would argue the game is even better when you don’t know about these things because you’re more likely to be surprised by what you are confronting.

In my opinion it can go either way. I have read several Lovecraft stories and other cosmic horror stories and I find knowing these stories does not take away the fun I have playing this game. I also know some people who play this game and have never read Lovecraft but still have a great time playing.

More important than knowing what cosmic horror is would be understanding what you’re comfortable playing with in a horror game. Call of Cthulhu is generally considered to be equivalent to a PG-13 rating as far as horror goes. I don’t know about you but I have seen some disturbing things in PG-13 movies I might not be comfortable role playing so knowing your limits is good before you get into this game.

In a future post I’ll have some advice on how to know your limits and if you are the Keeper, know how to stick to the limits of the group so everyone has a good time.

While the broad theme here is cosmic horror, there are all kinds of scenarios, time periods and different ways to play this game so you won’t necessarily be fighting against some horrific alien god. It just depends on what your group wants out of the game.

The Cthulhu mythos was invented by H.P. Lovecraft but tons of other writers have added to and re-interpreted these stories. So, while the mythos is the basis of the game, it’s not the only aspect of it out there. Don’t let the theme of cosmic horror limit your fun. Just know it is a horror game with horror elements so make sure you can handle that before you start.

H.P. Lovecraft

H.P. Lovecraft was an America pulp fiction writer in the 1920’s. He wrote stories such as The Dunwitch Horror, The Shadow Over Innsmouth, At the Mountains of Madness, and of course, The Call of Cthulhu. His stories sparked a legion of horror fans imaginations although he didn’t get much credit at the time. Notable authors from Stephen King to Clive Barker, Neil Gaiman and Matt Ruff were all inspired by his works in one way or another.

While it would be nice if we could believe all H.P. Lovecraft gave us were scary stories that are fun to read in the night, we have to address the racist in the room. Lovecraft, as a person, was a bigoted, xenophobic, racist person who wrote some truly awful things. If you don’t want to play this game on the basis of that alone, I cannot blame you. You would be justified in that decision.

However, one thing to keep in mind here is that the game is not the same as the man. Lovecraft did not come up with the role playing game and the makers of this game have repeatedly acknowledged the racism Lovecraft showed in his life. Even the Lovecraft Society who tries to keep his stories alive in the public disavows all of the racist history of the man.

I think one of the best shows to take on who Lovecraft was and show how his creations could be used while not ignoring his racism has to be Lovecraft Country. It’s a great show, full of cosmic horror and you can watch it on HBO Max. Do be warned though it’s graphic and violent and very bloody.

While some people might say you should read a lot of Lovecraft before playing this game, my recommendation would be just to read cosmic horror written by any author you enjoy. One I can recommend is Gunmetal Gods written by Zamil Akhtar. You absolutely do not have to have read H.P. Lovecraft to know what cosmic horror is.

All of this is just to say that while Lovecraft’s works clearly inspired this game, you do not have to agree with his view of the world to enjoy it. This is a diverse game that can be enjoyed by a diverse audience whether or not you know anything about H.P. Lovecraft. And in fact some of the best cosmic horror is set in Lovecraft’s mythos but written by diverse voices with interesting things to say about what might be found out there.

What You Need to Play

There are several ways to play Call of Cthulhu and as I mentioned there are versions of the game that are set in different time periods, some that are more action oriented, and even games you can play where you don’t need anything but yourself, a pencil, and a scenario to follow along with. For the purposes of these posts I am going to focus on the traditional version of Call of Cthulhu which usually takes place in the 1920’s in America. I should also mention this is for the 7th edition of the game which is the most current edition.

I’m going to list out everything you need to get started so let’s get right into it. You only need 4 things to get started.

1. Rules

To play this version of the game there are some things you need. First and foremost you need the rules. The quickstart rules are free on drivthrurpg.com or you can get them on the Chaosium website but you may have to pay for them there. Quickstart rules are the bare minimum of what you need to play but there are other books you can purchase if you know you are going to really get into this game.

You can also get the Keeper’s Rulebook and the Investigator’s Handbook. These are both available as PDF’s on drivethrurpg.com or if you want hardcover books you can get them at the Chaosium website.

Just to make it clear, you don’t need to buy either the Keeper’s Rulebook or Investigator’s Handbook in order to start playing. They’re nice to have and they are great books but test out the quickstart rules prior to paying for any hardcover or PDF books.

If you know already you plan to play this game longterm you will want the Keeper’s Rulebook. The Investigator’s Handbook adds a lot of value for players but it is not required to play the game. For that book I would recommend one person in your group have it and it be shared around with people at the table.

2. Dice

This game involves dice roles so you need some dice in order to play. While any standard set of gaming dice which includes a d4, d6, d8, d10, d12, d20 and percentile die will do, for this game the most important dice are the d10 and percentile dice. A d10 is a ten sided die with numbers 0-9 on it. The percentile die is also a ten sided die but it usually has the tens places on it so 00-90. If you don’t have a percentile die you can simply use two d10’s as long as you are always consistent with which one is the ones place and which one is the tens place.

Another secret here is that while the set of 7 gaming dice will do, you actually do not need a d12 because Call of Cthulhu does not actually use that die for anything. If you play other role playing games it can be good to have though so I’d go for the set of seven dice.

3. Pencils and paper

You’ll need something to write with and to write on. Most likely you are going to want character sheets for your investigators. This is another free resource you can get on Drivethrurpg.com. You’ll probably want some extra paper as well just to jot down notes of what is happening during the session. It may not seem significant in the moment but if you end up playing long term this can be key to remembering what happened previously.

As far as what to write with I recommend pencils with erasers but if you want to live on the edge and use a pen, you do you.

4. People

You are going to need at least one person to play Call of Cthulhu. And by one person, I mean yourself. You can actually find several single player scenarios for this game if you don’t have other people to play with. I recommend starting with Alone Against the Flames. It not only has a compelling story, it also teaches you how to play and fill out the character sheet. If you are going to be the Keeper, I recommend playing this at least once on your own before playing with a group. And if you like it, there are several follow ups which are equally as fun but you will have to pay for those.

If you want to play with friends you can have as few as one other person to up to 4 other people play. Beyond that the groups can get a bit unwieldy to manage and with more people it does become harder to convey a horror feel. Some of the most intense games can be 1 on 1 where you just have a Keeper and an Investigator.

So find some likeminded people who are into role playing games and horror and you will be ready to get started. But, I have one more tip for you before you start. There is one great way to start with this game and while it isn’t completely free, it’s very reasonably priced.

The Starter Set

As far as everything I talked about that you need to start this game, there is one way I think is the best way to get going. You get the most bang for your buck with the starter set. If you already have dice then your best bet is getting it on drivethrurpg. And right now you can get it for $4.19. That’s a very good price to pay for hours of role playing. That will only get you the PDF’s however. If you want the full set with everything you see below get it on the Chaosium website. That will run you a little more at $24.99 but it’s cheaper than buying any of the hardcover books.

Call of Chtulhu Starter Set

This set is my favorite way to get new players involved in this game and it’s tons of fun. I’ve never regretted spending on this set and if you take nothing else from this post, this is my number one top recommendation of how to get started. Just find some friends and buy the starter set and you will be able to get going.

In Conclusion

Hopefully this post helped you to know where to start with playing Call of Cthulhu. As for whether or not this game is for you, that’s for you to decide. But if you do decide to play and want a more in-depth look at the game, keep your eye on this space as I walk us through the game.

Next time, I’ll take a much closer look at the character sheets and show you how to create an Investigator to play in your own scenario at home. In the meantime, if you’ve played this game, I’d love to hear how it went for you and what some of your top tips are for playing. Feel free to let me know in the comments.

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Marvel 616 Comic Book Review – Tales to Astonish #38

Tales to Astonish Issue 38 Photo Credit: Marvel

After several issues of Henry “Hank” Pym fighting generic communists and occasional street thugs we finally come to an issue where a real villain is introduced. Due to Ant-Man consistently crushing crime with his amazing abilities and legions of ants who can drop in at just the right moment the crooks in the city have decided to put a stop to him. They know they are no match for him on their own. Brute force has failed so it’s time to turn to brains over brawn.

In Washington D.C. a scientist known as “The Egghead” is in trouble with the government. He’s been selling secret information to the highest foreign bidder. His response to these accusations? “To a genius like me your insipid patriotic ramblings are laughable! I sneer at you all!” Okay, so the early Marvel 616 wasn’t great at subtlety but you know a villain when you see one. I should also mention Egghead fits his moniker not only because he is smart but because his head is drawn in the shape of an egg.

The government doesn’t actually have proof of Egghead’s crimes so they let him go. Criminals get wind of this and figure he’s the right guy to take down Ant-Man. They get twenty grand together and pay him half up front, half to be paid once the job is done. If you’re wondering how these criminals could so easily get twenty thousand dollars together when they say they’re having so much difficulty getting away with crime, welcome to the club.

Anyway, Egghead actually takes the time to study Ant-Man and his insect allies. He figures out pretty quickly Ant-Man must communicate with the ants through electronic signals. Egghead plans to turn these ants against our hero and trap Hank with flypaper. He invents a machine to communicate with them and appeals to the insects’ sense of greed and vanity.

The next phase of Egghead’s diabolical plan is to steal a valuable necklace, allowing the criminals to get away with the goods, and trap Ant-Man at the same time. Only, as soon as Ant-Man is caught, things start to go wrong for Egghead.

Ant-Man doesn’t stick to the fly paper at all. The tires of the getaway car have been flattened. And a gang of thugs is trapped in a huge sheet of flypaper by the ants. It turns out the ants are not greedy and vain. In fact, they see themselves as Henry’s friends and partners in the crime against war. Most of the thugs are taken away but Egghead takes his defeat pretty hard, although he gets away. He ends up “wanted by the police and hunted by the underworld as he holes up in a dingy bowery flophouse…” (By the way it’s this sort of description that makes these early issues so much fun to read. You just don’t see narration like that in comics anymore)

The people around him now seem to regard him as a worthless bum who keeps going on and on about ants. But this being a Marvel comic, we know we have not seen the last of Egghead. He’s definitely going to want to take his revenge and he does become a notable villain not just to Ant-Man but to a few other superheroes down the line.

This is sort of the first Ant-Man story where it feels like Henry is being brought into the larger world of superheroes. There have been a few hints and subtle, possible connections to people like Reed Richards and Bruce Banner but you’re not really a Marvel superhero until you get a repeat villain. Egghead will be the first one for Ant-Man but he certainly is not the last.

Next up on the reading list it’s time to pull out your best purple pants because we’re going back to the big, green guy himself with The Incredible Hulk #5!

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TV Review The Legend of Vox Machina (Season 1)

The Legend of Vox Machina

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Hey dungeon crawlers it’s me, Slick Dungeon. I spent this weekend finally binging my way through the animated hit on Amazon Prime The Legend of Vox Machina. If you don’t know, this show is based off of the hit live play world of Critical Role. Critical Role is basically a Dungeons & Dragons live play game where a bunch of notable voice actors get together to supremely nerd out and roll some dice. That show proved so insanely popular the cast members decided to make a kickstarter to fund an animation project about their characters. It was one of the fastest funded projects at the time. Brandon Sanderson has, of course, obliterated that record in the last week but it was fun while it lasted.

Anyway, this is a review of the show, not a history of how the show came to be. Before I go any further, I should mention there will be spoilers in this review. If you haven’t watched this show go watch it and come back here. Of course, if you are a fan of Critical Role, it’s a little hard to spoil this show because you probably watched it happen already.

Still with me? Good. So, what do you need to know about this show? First, since I often publish posts related to tabletop role playing with kids, I need to make it clear that, while this show is animated, it is not suitable for younger kids. Critical Role never claimed to be for kids and this show is about as adult as you can get in animation. I don’t think this is a problem with the show in any way, I just want to make sure my readers are aware of it.

Unlike most other cartoons, Vox Machina does not take the time to go through and introduce each character one at a time. Rather, the world is set up in moments, showing us a heroic adventuring party ready to fight evil who get instantly demolished by a huge dragon. Then we cut to Vox Machina getting into a good ol’ tavern brawl and generally acting like a bunch of buffoons.

It’s fun and hilarious and sets the perfect tone for the whole show. We don’t need to be introduced to the team because they need no introduction. Some of the characters even question why they hang out together at all in the first place. As a long time D&D player, that’s a very D&D question.

If you love fantasy but haven’t really watched Critical Role or played Dungeons & Dragons you will still very likely enjoy this show. There are all of the fantasy elements you could want. There’s vicious antagonists, heroic deeds, and a gnome polymorphed into a triceratops. I’m not sure how much better it gets than that. However, if you don’t enjoy fantasy or Dungeons & Dragons this really may not be for you. You do get more out of it if you play D&D or at least watch Critical Role but it’s not going to be for everyone.

The cast is top notch voice acting perfection. The show features the main cast of Critical Role, Matt Mercer, Marisha Rey, Ashley Johnson, Laura Bailey, Taliesin Jafee, Liam O’brien, Sam Riegel and Travis Willingham. If you’ve watched a cartoon or played a video game in the last ten years you have heard at least one of their voices before. But on top of that there are some notable guest voices. The three that come to mind are David Tennet who you may remember (you definitely remember) as the Tenth Doctor in Doctor Who, Khary Payton who plays Ezekiel on The Walking Dead and is the voice of Cyborg in a number of animated DC projects, and Dominic Monaghan who you either know from the show Lost or definitely know as Merry from The Lord of the Rings movies.

Like with any show, animated or not, there are some stronger and some weaker episodes and story arcs. In this first season, Percy, played by Taliesin Jafee gets a pretty epic story here. Grogg, played by Travis Willingham and Scanlan played by Sam Riegel both get great moments in battle as well as some hilarious comedy on the side. Keyleth played by Marisha Rey gets to re-do a key moment from the live stream of Critical Role and it works much better in the animated show. She also has a couple of moments that look like they will feed into the next season but there are times she is underused. The elf twins Vax and Vex played by Liam O’brien and Laura Bailey respectively get a few good moments but are overall in the background. In my mind the character who shines the least here is Pike played by Ashley Johnson. She’s not a bad character by any means and what she does in the show matters greatly to the overall plot but it gets fairly metaphysical and is simply not the most compelling storyline, especially compared to what else is happening in the show. Yet, I would say this show would hit five stars for me if there was less screen time with Pike’s character. It just wasn’t quite compelling enough.

There are incredible moments in this show and the animation is fantastic. It’s the right blend of detailed backgrounds and clean lines on the characters. It lends itself to believability while not taking itself too seriously either. And there are moments of horror which are fairly terrifying, even in animated form.

While this show is not going to appeal to everyone, there is more than enough here to keep most viewers coming back for more. I’d sort of like to see a full length animated movie with the same characters because it is a little odd watching this in 30 minute chunks. I also wished they could have used the intro from Critical Role in this show but it doesn’t really make sense here so I can’t really blame them for that.

If you need a good adult oriented fantasy cartoon to binge this is an excellent choice as long as you don’t mind a bit of crude humor and absurdity to go along with it.

Critically yours,

Slick Dungeon

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Marvel 616 Comic Book Review – Journey Into Mystery #87

Journey Into Mystery Issue 87 Photo Credit: Marvel

Reading about heroes defeating communists in the early Marvel 616 books is… kind of exhausting. There are so many times these heroes come up against “the reds” it can be hard to keep track of. While in a book like The Incredible Hulk or Tales to Astonish where Bruce Banner and Hanky Pym are both scientists working on major government initiatives it makes some sense. But pitting the Norse god of thunder himself against a bunch of everyday communist thugs is kind of like, well, pitting a Norse god against any normal person. We know who is going to win.

For the plot of this one, it seems the communists are staging abductions of key scientists, making it look like they defected of their own free will. Dr. Don Blake gets word of this and realizes there is more to the story and Thor could totally demolish these people doing the kidnapping. We are treated to scenes of Jane Foster both doting over Dr. Don Blake and his many illnesses while still pining in her mind for Thor. Of course, she really loves Don and he really loves her but neither has the courage to tell the other. It’s a direct reflection of the Superman/Lois Lane stories.

Blake signs up to pretend he has made a new biological warfare weapon in order to use himself as bait to get to the bottom of all the disappearances. The government somewhat reluctantly agrees. Blake is soon abducted when a communist in disguise takes his picture. Turns out the camera releases a paralyzing gas. I will say there have been quite a few incidents in the 616 universe so far involving trick cameras so these guys should definitely beware of the paparazzi.

I’m sure you can guess where this is going. With a few nifty tricks with his hammer Thor not only escapes but also rescues the missing scientists who never actually defected. Of course, he first has to let himself get captured so that the scientists are not outright killed. But soon enough Thor is tearing iron doors off and letting prisoners go.

While the art, as with all the Thor books, is striking and full of movement and energetic, the story is decidedly uninspired. It’s a real waste of an amazing hero. It certainly won’t be the last of communists who do go up against Thor but thankfully in the long run this happens less and less frequently.

Next up on the reading list we’re getting small again as we see what Hank Pym is up to in Tales to Astonish #38!

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Book Review – Revival by Stephen King

Revival by Stephen King

SUMMARY

In a small New England town, in the early 60s, a shadow falls over a small boy playing with his toy soldiers. Jamie Morton looks up to see a striking man, the new minister, Charles Jacobs. Soon they forge a deep bond, based on their fascination with simple experiments in electricity.

Decades later, Jamie is living a nomadic lifestyle of bar-band rock and roll. Now an addict, he sees Jacobs again – a showman on stage, creating dazzling ‘portraits in lightning’ – and their meeting has profound consequences for both men. Their bond becomes a pact beyond even the Devil’s devising, and Jamie discovers that revival has many meanings.

REVIEW

Rating: 2.5 out of 5.

At six years old, Jamie Morton is playing with his toy soldiers when a shadow looms over him. This is the shadow of the man named Charles Jacobs, a new minister in town. Jamie gets to know this man and the two have a connection until tragedy strikes Charles Jacobs.

Years later, Jamie is destined to be put in the shadow of Charles Jacobs once more. Jamie has succumbed to a heroin addiction after years of touring with various bands. Jacobs is no longer a minister. He’s now a carnival showman who can tap into what he calls “secret electricity” to not only perform neat tricks for crowds but also to cure people of their afflictions. Including addiction to heroine. Jamie’s life is saved by Jacobs but things might be better if he had never been cured.

While reading the book it doesn’t take very long for the reader to understand this is a Frankenstein story about a man obsessing over his grief and loss and willing to go to any extreme to change the world. He’ll pursue knowledge at the cost of anyone and anything that comes his way.

With most Stephen King books I am of the opinion the journey toward the end of the book is better than the ending itself. With this one I feel the exact opposite. The ending is fantastic but it takes more work than it is worth to get there.

While the character of Charles Jacobs is compelling and interesting and the reader always wonders what is exactly happening with him, the weak point is the main character of Jamie Morton. I never found myself caring enough about him for it to matter to me what happened to him. Also, the story of a man who is struggling through addiction is very well trodden territory for King and it never felt like anything new here.

If the book was cut by a third and told from the perspective of Charles Jacobs this really could have been one of King’s best books. That’s not what we have however and while there are great moments of horror and some compelling events, they don’t add up to a great book.

If you love stories about people who can’t quit their obsessions this is a good one and if you like anything Stephen King writes, this is not your worst choice. Just know, it’s also not your best choice.

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Introducing: Flash Fiction Fridays

Hey everyone. If you’re a reader of my blog you may have noticed I didn’t post a lot in February.

Well, there was a reason for that. I was participating in Flash Fiction February so a lot of my writing time was spent on that. I used the prompts in the Storytelling Collective for some of the stories I wrote and I just wrote whatever I wanted on some of the other stories. I’ve submitted a story to be included in Flashbang! Volume III. Once that comes out I’ll link to it here but I thought it might be fun to share a few of my stories on my blog. I can’t promise I’ll be posting one of these ever single Friday but I will when I can. I’m a few stories ahead so for a little while at least, there will be one each Friday.

In case you don’t know, flash fiction is a very short story. It usually means anywhere from 1-1,500 words but not more. I like writing these because the time investment is not too heavy for someone who is working full time.

If you enjoy these stories, or even if you don’t, let me know in the comments, just remember to keep it civilized. I’m totally open to criticism and want to improve so feel free to let me know what you think. If no one enjoys these I probably won’t keep posting but if they go over well, I’ll likely post more stories here.

One last thing to note is these are my stories which I own the copyright to so please no plagiarizing. If you do like them though, please, please feel free to share, reblog, post on your social media and all of that good stuff.

The first story I’m going to share with you is an old one I wrote quite some time ago. But, the prompt of the word Time from last year’s Storytelling Collective Flash Fiction February reminded me of it and it was one of the first stories I wrote that actually felt like a story to me. This one is called Time Served.

Time Served

I need time, I need money, I need sleep.  The train rattles me along as these thoughts thunder in my head.  Just out of lock-up and released from parole I head towards my son.  I can’t sleep with the sound of the tracks thudding against me.  Any money I had is gone.  I got extra time for not pleading guilty to something I never done.  One man in a red shirt is the same as another to some people.  The therapist said I couldn’t let go of my anger until I admitted my wrongdoing.  Can’t admit to something I never done.  Can’t help being angry they didn’t believe me when I told the truth.

Six years gone.  Conviction overturned.  I need time, I need money, I need sleep.  I wonder if my boy knows me.  I wonder if I know him.  I wonder why she never visited me.  I wonder what happened in all that time.  I wonder if I will see wrinkles on her face and bags under her eyes.  The train rolls along, steady, steady.

They gave me a pass, said I had no parole but no place to stay, no compensation neither.  Just a ticket to anywhere I want to go.  I go to my boy.  Getting off in Wisconsin, the chill wind hits me like a fist.  I pull my cap lower over my ears and start walking.  No money left, none for the bus ticket. 

My old man was a con.  Only my old man was guilty.  I saw him take that money, I saw him point the gun.  My boy never saw me with no gun never and I don’t want him to.  My legs ache from the stretch of walking, so much walking, and I sit down for a minute on a bench.  In the yard they let us walk.  One hour every day.  The only hour of the day my body was allowed to move and feel free.  The time my mind brought images of my boy.  Safe in the outside world up on the monkey bars, out in the snow, laughing with his friends.

I reach the address I have written down.  The paper I hold in my hand is the only letter, only sign of anything I ever got from her in all that time.  One letter, one address, one bit of bad news I still can’t process.  I don’t want to walk in there.  I’m more afraid than I was the day they locked me up for good.

I stamp my feet and walk through the doors.  They slide open automatically.  The smell hits me.  It’s sterile and clean.  Going up to the room I pass people in scrubs.  I can’t help but think how the guards look the same in their uniforms.  They are the people that have access to the outside.  They are the ones that can leave all this behind.  Not me.  Not her.  Not my boy.  All of us prisoners.

I reach the room and she is in a chair by the bed, a book on her lap.  The machines are by him.  They loom large like iron gated walls did for me.  She looks up.  I see the wrinkles, I see the tiredness.  She gives me a crooked smile but doesn’t move.

I have been traveling for so long, unable to sleep, unable to think, I don’t know what to say.  She lets out a sob.  I left off crying long ago.

I wait for her to say something.  She never does.

I look at the boy.  The machines breathe for him.  It’s worse than I had imagined.  I was locked in a room but my body was always free to move. I have no scars, just my ink. He has bandages covering all of his scars and bruises. I wasn’t there when it happened.  I keep thinking how he always held my hand at the crosswalk.  Even when he was too old for it, he always reached for my hand. 

 “You thought I done it,” I say.

“It would make it easier,” she says.  Then she sits silent, her eyes staring at the floor.

“All this stuff.  These things keeping him from dying, how much they cost?” I ask.

“There was a settlement.  Money’s almost gone now.  Court says the driver paid his share. Doc says he could get better. ” She looks away from me.

We sit and say nothing.  The windows go dark and night falls.  Still I sit when she leaves.  I look at my boy with contraptions in his mouth and his chest moving up and down in rhythm.  There is one that says Brain Wave Activity.  It moves back and forth, rapid fire, faster than I can follow it.  His mind is screaming to get out.  The way I was screaming to get out.  I thought I had no chance but they let me out in the end.  I want to let him out too.

I think about my time in lock-up.  I think about how they put me there for nothing.  I think about how if I had at least been guilty I could try to make up for what happened.  But for this there is nothing.  I try to sleep but I can’t.  My boy never moves on his own.  Not once.

I start to think that lock-up isn’t so bad.  I start to think about how I can survive there.  I start to think what it would have meant if I had robbed somebody.  I start to think how hard it is going to be to find someone that will hire a man who served time.  I start to reconsider the gun.  I start to think that maybe all the money I could get will help my boy live longer. I start to wonder if I should do what I served time for.

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Lloyd the Conqueror – Movie Review

Lloyd the Conqueror

Rating: 2.5 out of 5.

Hey everyone, Slick Dungeon here. I’m back to review another movie. This time I watched Lloyd the Conqueror which is the only complete, feature length movie I know of about LARPing. If you don’t know, that stands for Live Action Role Playing. It’s basically Dungeons & Dragons but everyone is dressed up and hits each other with fake swords and stuff. Just a quick word of warning there will be some spoilers below so if that’s important to you, watch the movie first.

This movie starts out with a group of three friends who miss out on their community college assignment because they ended up playing a few too many hours of a new video game. (Side note: I think we’ve all been there) The problem is, the class they messed up their assignment in has the most brutal grader of the whole school and if they don’t pass, well goodbye to college. It’s basically Bill &Ted’s Excellent Adventure but instead of going back in history, these guys have to LARP. Why must they LARP? The teacher offers them an, “infernal accord” where if they play in the local LARPing tournament and beat the teacher’s team they will get an A. The teacher has won this tournament so many years in a row there are no contenders anymore and he needs a team to thrash so he can keep his record intact.

So, right here you have probably read enough to know where this is going. The guys who are failing, led by Lloyd, are first defeated in this tournament but then come back to face off with their teacher/enemy in the end. Along the way they learn that LARPing isn’t just for total nerds and they end up having some fun as well.

The movie has a lot of good things going for it. For starters Brian Posehn and Harland Williams are in it and if you’re enough of a nerd or comedy fan, you should know why those names are good to have in a film like this. The LARPing doesn’t take itself too seriously but it does stay true to the spirit of role playing most of the time.

There are some bad things going for this though. The first one I feel obligated to point out is there is an inordinate number of homophobic jokes here and I don’t think we can excuse that as a product of its time considering it came out in 2011. The second issue here is that it does lean in so hard on the LARPing that it gets kind of annoying. I mean, role playing is fun and all and I’m down to dress up in costume but the movie makes it seem like anyone who does this more or less dedicates their life to it. Finally, and this is just a personal issue, there was a joke insulting Star Wars and I’m a big fan of that franchise so I had to dock it half a star right there.

Thankfully the movie is not overly long so if you’re curious about LARPing it’s worth a watch. If you’re a super nerd it’s definitely worth watching and you’ll probably get a few chuckles out of it. However, I hope there will come along a better movie for LARPing. Maybe something similar to what Stranger Things did for Dungeons & Dragons.

Fantastically yours,

Slick Dungeon

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The Mad Women’s Ball- Movie Review

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Hey everyone, Slick Dungeon here back to review another movie for ya. This time I watched The Mad Women’s Ball on Amazon Prime. Please be warned there may be some spoilers below so if you hate that sort of thing, watch the movie before reading.

This is technically labeled as horror by Amazon but that’s really stretching it for this film. The movie is about Eugenie Clery who is able to communicate with spirits. We never actually see any of the spirits and there’s not so much as a single jump scare here but the plot is central to the fact that Eugenie does, in fact, communicate with spirits.

The film is a period piece set in France just after the death of Victor Hugo. The first scene is Eugenie attending his funeral and then going back home to tell her family about it. I think this quickly establishes her independence and helps the audience to know she’s an intelligent woman who may be ahead of her own times. She lives with her father, brother, mother and grandmother. The brother seems to support Eugenie’s independent spirit while the father is sternly against anything going outside of traditional roles for women.

The audience knows for certain Eugenie is communicating with spirits because she knows things no one else can and there is a very convincing performance here by Lou de Laâge as Eugenie. As things go on, Eugenie lets her secret out once too many times and this is where the film really gets going. Her father and brother take her to a mental asylum (which is what these places were called back then) and because they are men, and they can, they leave her there indefinitely.

If you’re a long time reader of my blog you have probably read me railing against the trope of the mental asylum in horror more than once. It can be old and tired and oftentimes downright offensive to people who have mental illness. On the flip side of that, there are films that get this right. They make the characters in these institutions feel like people not just a convenient reason to have someone run around with a knife to scare the audience. The Mad Women’s Ball is one of these rare exceptions that truly gets this right. The character are real, fleshed out characters, with a multitude of motivations, reasons for being where they are and hopes and dreams. All the while, many of them are there for unfair and unjust reasons, and since this is an asylum for women, it’s pretty clear the men are the ones who get to decide if they stay or go.

Eugenie is understandably upset and afraid when she is dropped here so of course she’s labeled hysterical almost immediately. Things keep turning worse for her as she either states she talks with spirits or is scared by them. She quite reasonably argues to people who are going to church that it’s no more crazy to believe in spirits than to believe the incidents of spirits in the bible. Those people weren’t locked up but Eugenie is.

All in all I think this film is a blistering criticism of the patriarchal routes of modern mental health care and more than any other film I can think of shows how out of touch the doctors of the time were with their patients. The real horror here is not at all that Eugenie can speak with spirits, it’s how these women are treated, put on display, looked down upon, and overall abused. At the same time it doesn’t simply put all men in the same bucket of horrible. Eugenie’s brother seems to be a kind and caring man who actually thought he would be helping his sister by placing her in the asylum.

If you want a film with excellent performances, set in an asylum, where the characters are multidimensional and the plot does not feel like it is simply trampling over the issues of the time, this is an excellent film to check out. My only real criticism here is it is a bit slow at points and there is a lot of silence in the beginning which makes it feel like a bit of a slog at the start. However, once Eugenie ends up in the asylum there is plenty of movement of the plot and things get interesting after that.

Have you watched this one? If so, let me know what you thought of it in the comments.

Dramatically yours,

Slick Dungeon

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Slick Dungeon’s 2022 Challenge Check-in!

Hey everyone, Slick Dungeon here. February is a short month but it’s still hard to believe it’s already over. I wanted to do a monthly check-in on how I am doing on the challenges I created for books, movies, and role playing games for this year. If you want to see how I did, this is the post for you! And if you have been doing any of these challenges, I would love to know how it’s going for you. Let me know in the comments!

Reading Challenge

Slick Dungeon’s 2022 Book Challenge! Click the image to download your own copy!

The second challenge on this list is to read a book that is more than 500 pages long. February is a short month so I didn’t quite finish. I’m working on reading The Great Hunt by Robert Jordan but as I have mentioned before on this blog I am a bit of a slow reader. I’ll complete that part of the challenge but I don’t know when. I did, however, read an independently published book. The Winding by Avi Datta was good enough to earn five stars from me and one I would recommend to anyone who likes a good time travel story with a bit of romance in it. It reminded me of The Time Traveler’s Wife. So, while I didn’t check off the second one on the list, I did in fact, check off a box this month.

Movie Challenge

Slick Dungeon’s 2022 Movie Challenge! Click the image to download your own copy!

For the second month in a row I did not end up watching a movie about love but I’m sure I’ll come across one soon. I did watch a movie I had never heard of. It’s called The Madwomen’s Ball and I found out about it from bkgriffinsnest. I’ll be posting my review of it tomorrow so if you are interested in what I thought of it, stay tuned.

Read, Watch, Play CHallenge

Slick Dungeon’s 2022 Read, Watch, Play challenge! Click the image about to download your own copy!

For this one I am still reading Vampire of the Mists which is set in Barovia, a gothic horror setting for Dungeons & Dragons. The next challenge on the list is to watch a movie where the characters play Dungeons & Dragons. I thought about watching E.T. but decided to go with Lloyd the Conqueror. The characters technically LARP but they roll D20’s and there’s enough D&D references in there I think it counts. I’ll be reviewing that one the day after tomorrow so if you want to know my thoughts on it, again stay tuned.

In Conclusion

Well, that’s where I’m at for these challenges so far this year. Have you tried any of them? If so, how’s it going? Also, a reminder, if you complete one of these challenges and post about it on your blog and let me know, I will review anything you would like me to. (Within reason of course). If you want me to review your book or movie or role playing game or one you just really want to know my opinion about, simply put your link to your blog post in the comments, and let me know and I will contact you about reviewing something for you.

If you would like a copy of any of my challenges, feel free to download from the image, or click here for books, movies, and read, watch, play challenges.

If you enjoy my content and want more, sign up for my mailing list below.

Until next time, stay slick out there!

Challengingly yours,

Slick Dungeon